Discouraging Comments... (Full Version)

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jzins2kids -> Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 10:12:14 AM)

I was extremely disappointed this weekend and felt that a comment must be posted.  So...here goes!  My son raced in the Pee Wee III Class and was the last to get off the line.  Jacob was visibly having a difficult time in the mud and was getting discouraged.  However, when I heard a lady yell to her son, "Tyler, pass him...he's too slow".  I can honestly say, I wanted to SLUG THE CRAP (putting it mildly) out of her.  I turned to her while trying to run to encourage my son at the next turn, I yelled back, "Yes, he is slow, he is my son and I would rather him be slow and safe than get hurt".  It was not much longer after that that we pulled him from the race.  He was visibly over-his-head and was upset.  He also told me later that night that he heard the lady call him "SLOW". 

As parents, we try to encourage EVERY child that goes out there to ride/race.  My son is NOT a racer; but, a child that goes out to ride an enjoyable ride.  Yes, he is the one that comes off the course to tell me that he saw my favorite flower out there.  With that said, I know at this point in time he will not be the next Scott D. or Jake K; but, you never know what the future holds.  However, when he is out there, he puts all of his effort to ride and finish...and always with a smile.  

So, the next time you want to shout something out, please make it a POSITIVE remark and try to remember that these are children that learn better with words of encouragement!    

P.S. - Remember, we are all there to have a fun family weekend. 




44Dwarf -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 10:22:14 AM)

Well put.  Sorry you had a bad experience.

"Any Fool Can Tear Down, It Take An Artist To Build"
 
44Dwarf




MR Honda -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 11:21:52 AM)

Dad, how old is Jacob?

And does he do other sports? Don't get me wrong, I agree with you about the loud mouth mom, as some parents tend to focus only on THEIR kid, BUT....

You did enter him in a RACE. Someone wins, someone will lose. I know you stated he's not a "racer", but some of the other kids may have been.

Take loudmouthMom with a grain of salt, and try to grow "thicker" skin, or you'll drive yourself crazy.

What I've witnessed and heard in the hockey rinks, baseball, soccer, lax fields, well, you wouldn't belive. it's not right, but it's reality these days.

At lease she didn't yell 'TYLER---TAKE HIM OUT"!!!!




TBTB -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 11:42:27 AM)

I think you should know your kids ability on a bike before you enter them in a sanctioned event. You even say in your post "My son is not a racer". So my question to you is......... Why did you put him out there? If he just wants to ride and have fun than thats not the place to do it.

I don't have kids, but I have been a sweep rider in a few Pee Wee events and there are a few kids at each event that are out there and are not ready for it yet. They don't have the riding ability yet and that is not there fault. It is the parents fault for putting there kids out there.

Your son should have been riding in a Nervous Novice Event where you could have be on your bike helping him to learn.

As far what the lady yelled.....she could have just stop at Tyler pass him....but racin' is racin' at any age and if you want him to be a racer you better get use to stuff like this.




joegencon -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 11:53:55 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: TBTB

I think you should know your kids ability on a bike before you enter them in a sanctioned event. You even say in your post "My son is not a racer". So my question to you is......... Why did you put him out there? If he just wants to ride and have fun than thats not the place to do it.

I don't have kids, but I have been a sweep rider in a few Pee Wee events and there are a few kids at each event that are out there and are not ready for it yet. They don't have the riding ability yet and that is not there fault. It is the parents fault for putting there kids out there.

Your son should have been riding in a Nervous Novice Event where you could have be on your bike helping him to learn.

As far what the lady yelled.....she could have just stop at Tyler pass him....but racin' is racin' at any age and if you want him to be a racer you better get use to stuff like this.


   Sorry terry but that's the wrong answer.  The Pee Wee series is for kids to learn the art of trailriding and have fun.  It's not my interpretation it's the Pee Wee's mission.  If the parents want their kid to compete than they can go into the Mini class.  What you said above is the reason the Pee Wee series was almost canceled.  Read this post under the youth forum to understand what i am saying.

http://www.nedirtbikes.com/content/Discouraging_Comments%25%25%25/m_134922/tm.htm

This post should stay in the youth forum where it belongs.




jzins2kids -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 11:55:25 AM)

Before there are any other posts questioning Jacob's ability and our decision to enter him in race...He is in the correct Pee Wee Class.  He completes every race that he has entered and is not the last rider in; but, if he was we would still be proud of him.  With that said, that although we are aware that it is in fact a race, Pee Wee races for the riders to gain the confidence, as well as, skills.  I would hope and personally expect other parents to respect EVERY child out there and only encourage them.  Yes, as people have posted...it is a race.  However, there are many children going at their own speed.  Please don't turn this into a Tit for Tat game.  The "Mother" of the fellow racer was in the faster class, not even in my son's class and was in first place and was on his 2nd lap so there was no need for her comment to begin with.  My point for the original posting was to simply make other parents aware that these are children learning at different riding levels and should only be encouraged. 

P.S. - Once again, we are aware that it is a RACE; but, it should be made as enjoyable for all.





jzins2kids -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 12:00:53 PM)

Oops, forgot to answer MR Honda's questions...

Jacob plays:  Lacrosse, soccer (indoor and outdoor), baseball, etc.  We are fully aware of the fact that the main goal differs from parent to parent.  However, at the age that these children are, the lesson that these children should be learning is self-confidence, learning skills and maintaining a good attitude out of it.  

Personally, I love to see my Nephew Cody and his friends finish the race with a "congrats" no matter who beat whom first.  You don't have to agree with me; but, hopefully by my posting my original posting will make other parents aware of how encouraging words can only help children. 




joegencon -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 12:01:11 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jzins2kids

Before there are any other posts questioning Jacob's ability and our decision to enter him in race...He is in the correct Pee Wee Class.  He completes every race that he has entered and is not the last rider in; but, if he was we would still be proud of him.  With that said, that although we are aware that it is in fact a race, Pee Wee races for the riders to gain the confidence, as well as, skills.  I would hope and personally expect other parents to respect EVERY child out there and only encourage them.  Yes, as people have posted...it is a race.  However, there are many children going at their own speed.  Please don't turn this into a Tit for Tat game.  The "Mother" of the fellow racer was in the faster class, not even in my son's class and was in first place and was on his 2nd lap so there was no need for her comment to begin with.  My point for the original posting was to simply make other parents aware that these are children learning at different riding levels and should only be encouraged. 

P.S. - Once again, we are aware that it is a RACE; but, it should be made as enjoyable for all.




   Jennifer you should post this only in the youth forum. 




Donkey Punch -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 12:05:29 PM)

Waaaaaa! someone yelled that my kid is slow Waaaaaaa! Switch to Earth ball where there are no losers only winners! Like a previous poster said Grow a thicker skin! From what you said he was slow! Maybe we should make all the other kids ride slower so your kid feels better about his racing experience.




joegencon -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 12:11:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Donkey Punch

Waaaaaa! someone yelled that my kid is slow Waaaaaaa! Switch to Earth ball where there are no losers only winners! Like a previous poster said Grow a thicker skin! From what you said he was slow! Maybe we should make all the other kids ride slower so your kid feels better about his racing experience.



   This is why we have a youth forum ^




KawiCam -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 12:24:20 PM)

Please remember the Pee Wee program is for all children just starting out or that have no intention of racing. It is similar to the adult Turkey run series. A bunch of people who love motorcycles and want to ride with a variety of people on different courses.

Competition begins in the Mini program.......and even then if you look around in the pits you will see most of the parents helping any of the children who come in. Art Korn use to pride himself in helping whomever needed it in the pit he never wanted Jake to beat someone in the pits he wanted the race on the course to determine the talent for the day.

Most parents of NETRA get this and understand this and that is what sets us apart from the little league, popwarner football, soccer, hocky and lacross parents.

Remember they are only children once!!!!!!!!!!




Rooks -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 1:49:54 PM)

Definitely an unfortunate situation to be involved in.  Too many people out there that don't think before they open their trap.

If it makes your son feel any better....you can let him know that even at the age of 41.....people still yell things like that at me every time I race. 




steve erickson -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 2:16:05 PM)

All I can add to this, is leave it to an adult to f--- up a event meant for the kids.You see it in any organized sport out there unfortunately.





MR Honda -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 3:22:10 PM)

jzins2kids,

I think it's fantastic that you have involved your son at an early stage in our sport. Jacob is lucky, and hopefully isn't too discouraged. The fact that he is involved with other sports may prove he's seen and heard idiot parents before. For every good parent, there is a bonehead one too.

I meant no disrespect with my original questions, just trying to get a full picture.

I agree that MOST involved in the sport are decent folks. You do get the occasional idiot, and for that one drop of ink in the gallon of milk, we all suffer.

Let Jacob know that the last HS I did, I was pulled too! And I'm a little bit older than Rooks!




Throttlemonkey -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 5:32:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Donkey Punch

Waaaaaa! someone yelled that my kid is slow Waaaaaaa! Switch to Earth ball where there are no losers only winners! Like a previous poster said Grow a thicker skin! From what you said he was slow! Maybe we should make all the other kids ride slower so your kid feels better about his racing experience.



I was going to delete this post but then I figured it was better to leave it so everyone could see how ignorant you are.  I am by no means an advocate of the 'town soccer mentality' where every kid is treated equally, kids will learn a lot about the reality of life while racing, some will do better than others no matter how hard they try.  The point of the original post is that parents shouldn't be yelling at other kids during an event.  I created the Code of Conduct for the PeeWee series to prevent this type of behavior,(http://www.netra.org/rulebooks/peewee_rules.pdf   I.F 2)  the PeeWee coordinator should be informed and should speak with the parent in question.  Under the rules as written the rider would forfeit their award if the parent did it again.  That usually solves the problem pretty quickly.




BTR C Squid -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 8:13:58 PM)

"pass him he's too slow" does not sound that derogatory to me. Like someone else posted, at least she did not say "take him out" I agree that the peewee series is all about fun, and learning. The kids also need to learn that they may NOT be the fastest kid out there, and if he or she is not, then they should let the faster kids by. I personnally have had alot of peewee experiences, that is why my boy races mini-b.




fishwife -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/4/2008 8:38:28 PM)

I still can not believe the amount of mud I power washed of of Owens 110 on Sunday morning. And the really funny part is the difficulty I had just walking around the track that day, forget about riding or even racing...! Any kid who made it around just part of the first lap or around the whole thing one time must be, and should be very proud. I still dont know how they stayed up and going forward, and again racing in it.
Thank you to the Berkshire Trailriders for a great day of fun, adventure and learning to ride (and try to survive) in BIG MUD. The kids will only be better riders after that day!!!!The "discouraging comments" are a good reality check for us to make sure that we are positive with are words to all PEE WEE racers, on and of the track.  Its all about the kids!  Thanks again BT and PEE WEE advisors.  Michael, Kim and Owen Payne.




Fire Escape -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/5/2008 3:40:15 PM)

IF THIS TOPIC CONTINUES ON IT'S CURRENT TREND
 
OF
 
NAME CALLING AND PERSONAL ATTACKS
 
 
IT IS DONE
 
                                                                                                           [sm=rdr.gif]     Bruce
 
 
      And I don't care who started it, it needs to be over!




danwilms -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/5/2008 4:53:52 PM)

Invite him to come ride a trials pee wee event. We dig slow. He'll also see 12 year olds beating 30 year olds and girls beating guys and everybody happy just to be out enjoying the scenery and playing on a bike.




Dan J. -> RE: Discouraging Comments... (8/5/2008 5:29:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Fire Escape

IF THIS TOPIC CONTINUES ON IT'S CURRENT TREND
 
OF
 
NAME CALLING AND PERSONAL ATTACKS
 
 

 
                                                                                                    
 

Can I call Bobler names?




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